It is through a discussion with a dear friend that we started asking ourselves to which extent the physical outlook can impact our lives. Looking back to what my life has been till now, I started asking myself if really my decision to have a nose job 25 years ago might have affected the path of my life.
What if I kept my “fat big nose”, maybe I would have not relied so easily on my physical outlook and instead built up faster my identity?
Getting back to my memories, after my operation I will never forget that day where I was riding the bus heading to university and I spotted my reflection in a mirror. I tried then to ignore the sinking feeling in my stomach and an inner voice telling me something irreversibly wrong happened. Technically, my nose was different and had the perfect shape I had longed for; a large bump had been removed so that, in profile, it was perfectly straight. Besides, the good plastic surgery made it impossible to tell that I have had anything done.
Although I was feeling beautiful, I could not help this vulnerability feeling to take over me. And it grew up with time.
Now I just realize that I wasn’t truly me and I know that I have fundamentally changed a part of myself and that I can’t get it back. Unfortunately, my insecurities crept in as a vulnerable child, before I had built my identity.
There is no doubt that, I feel like I had let myself down and that I was some sort of automaton – the product of a looks-obsessed society.
Today I kind have this certainty that it would have taken me less time building up myself if I still had my old nose. Now, I don’t think I would have batted an eyelid at looking less pretty. Because what I might not have realized is that my given physical traits may have been my greatest asset in my personal growth building process.
There are so many examples of people with disabilities or not so attractive outlook who end up becoming the greatest personalities because they just learned how to overcome the perceived negative aspect of it and turned it into a life changing purpose. These people have the strongest personalities!
This quest for perfection has a high price to pay so beware of it before looking into plastic surgery. Whatever you decide to change in your body just realize that it is a part of you that might be here for a beneficial purpose.
We will never attain the perfect physical image of ourselves, but we can attain the perfect being we are meant to be using the physical outlook we were born with. Instead of trying to transpose your identity to your physical outlook and experience the frustration linked to this process’s limits, learn to accept how you look and turn it into a strong asset.
Since my nose job, I have cast away the guilt feeling, accepted and honored the person I was when I took my nose job’ s decision. Reality is that the person I was at that time could not have taken another decision so I truly believe that we have to do the best we can with as much as understanding and awareness we have. The bump is gone and for that I am grateful 🙂
And you, have you been through a similar process?